Today I went to get my brakes on my car changed. I dropped my kids off at my neighbors and headed for the Meineke. I parked my car and walked past the garages to the office. I walked for about twenty feet under the eyes of two pot-bellied older mechanics. I shouldn't say I walked, because really I waddled. Part of my waddle can be chalked up to the pregnancy, but part of it is because I woke up with really sore quads this morning. I have no idea why. I'm really hoping I didn't sleep-run through our neighborhood last night - can you imagine seeing a pregnant lady sleep-running down the street at midnight? Anyway, those guys watched me all the way into the office. Then when I found out it would be a longer wait than I had time for, I walked back out of the office toward my car, right by the same guys. Just as I passed one of them got up the guts to ask,"When are you having that baby?
"Five weeks." It's closer to six weeks than five weeks right now, but I thought with the way he was looking at me it might be better to say five. Both guys' eyes got huge. The brave guy ticked his head and said,
"Maybe four weeks."
I love laughing hard, and that is what I did.
Then I went to another place where the wait was shorter. When my car was all done and after the guy, another older gentleman, had rung me up, he looked at me very seriously and said, "Now you be careful out there." The skies were clear, no major storms predicted, there were no thugs in the neighborhood ready to attack ladies who had recently had their car brakes changed, and no "cuidado piso mojado" signs behind me. I can only figure that my belly was the cause for caution.
And that is how big I am.
A BIG, EXCITING P.S. - I have time to read about 3 blogs regularly and one of them is thepioneerwoman.com. She did a contest where if you left a comment and she chose it she would donate $500 to your charity of choice. If you didn't get selected she was going to at least give 25 cents per comment to a charity that was helping out in Alabama. She got 23,000 responses. Well, goodnight, and holy cow, and knock me over with a feather, I meant to get 25 cents to Alabama and instead I got $500 to the LDS Humanitarian Fund (which I'm sure will get the money to Alabama). I'm feeling pretty pleased tonight and amazed at the goodness of people like Ree Drummond.
9 comments:
Jessica, I just have to say I have really been enjoying all your posts. Wessica, you really are hilarious! If you are anything like me, I bet you wouldn't mind having the baby come a little early!
Wacky Jackie!!!!! Oh how I would love to laugh with you in person again. If only my babies would come early. In about five weeks I should be getting pretty moany and groany on here about still being an oversized wonder.
I shouldn't point it out but you did want to write better didn't you? The things on your car are your brakes and having to get the brake pads changed is the breaks.
How could my spilling bee so bad! And I did it threw the hole thing. Their is no excuse to. Darn. Thanks mom (: I'm gonna change it right now.
Jessica P.,
Are you used to getting comments from complete strangers? Perhaps I'm the first. I came across you blog because of Pioneer Woman. I too had entered, wasn't that the best idea, and submitted LDS Humanitarian Fund as my charity of choice. Imagine my joy when I saw that though I hadn't been selected, my charity had.
I had to check out your blog after seeing you had won. Does that make me a stalker?! Ewww, I hope not.
I got a chuckle out of this post, you see, my daughter is also expecting a baby, her first, my first grandchild, and I imagined her as I read your lovely words.
I've also stolen your idea about 'nice people'. I'm currently working on my 'nice people post' for this week.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Veronica
veronicaaustin.blogspot.com
Thank you! It makes me happy to think of you doing the nice people post too. Congratulations on your first grandbaby. I know there isn't much that brings my Mom more joy in this world than her grandkids.
You got chosen by P-Dub?? Wow! You should play the lottery this week. I love that she is doing that for charity.
The awkward comments at the end of a pregnancy are enough to make a lady want to hole up inside her house for the last few weeks, but it is funny too (if you can maintain a sense of humor - which you always do)! :) Enjoy your last few weeks! Can't wait to see the baby!!
Yeah - crazy luck. I heard on NPR today that the U.S. pulled the plug on online poker this month. Too bad - I coulda made my millions. I mostly think being really, really, really pregnant is really, really, really funny - except when it is exhausting.
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